The Big Gay Question with respect to Christian faith might be the biggest question Christians have to face in our lifetimes; it isn’t the most pressing (mission, perhaps) or important (poverty?) issue, but because it wraps up issues of individual autonomy, the creation and dissolution of family and community, primal issues of safety and sex, Christian authority and liberty, and the use of political power in human relationships — it is hard to find a more deeply knotted issue. Add two well-organized and resolute “sides” and you get the makings of a fight.
And I don’t want to fight because I’m Christian and gay, one’s not going to go away at the expense of the other. As a Unitarian Universalist Christian, I’m already used to being thought an ontological impossibility. I don’t like that either, but better to be clear, if sometimes uncomfortable, and engage in respectful, measured speech.
But here’s the thing: gays and Christians — at least those with a vocation — are both likely to make a lot of other people uncomfortable. Neither is going to “go away.” Neither has a perfect track record of doing right by themselves, or truthfully (on the whole) of the other.